WHAT IF THESE FAMOUS PEOPLE TANGLED IN A UFC FIGHT? WHO WOULD WIN?

Ultimate fighting is a relatively new sport that combines several fight styles into a fast and furious bloodbath.

We wondered what would happen if celebrities were thrown into the mix and came to a few conclusions.

The first match would pit current teen idol Justin Bieber versus any Jonas brother. We pick any Jonas brother to beat the hell out of the new kid on the bubblegum block. The Jonases have all been replaced by a newer and younger pop star and that has got to sting a little in the ego department. Any Jonas brother would want to vent his frustration on the kid who stole his and his brothers’ thunder. This one would be quick and bloody.

Eric Cartman versus Bart Simpson would pit two cartoon misfits in an interesting match-up. Cartman has been involved in many scraps in ‘South Park’, but so has Bart in ‘The Simpsons’. Typically both have had their ass kicked on many occasions. On the other hand, Cartman has killed people. But I would pick Bart in a scrap. Cartman is a fat slug who runs out of steam in a hurry, so the wiry Bart would own him by the second round.

Jessica Simpson versus Britney Spears in a battle of formerly famous pop tarts. Both women would be motivated by the same bitter truth that the best is behind them in their careers. Anger would make this a close one, but I would pick Jessica to win the scrap. She has fallen further outside of the celebrity spotlight than Britney, so maybe a UFC career is a good move for her.

Al Gore versus Michael Moore in a battle of the (we-call-this- a) documentary heavyweights. Personally we would just like to see these two guys beat the hell out of each other and we would all win. But they are middle-aged men and it looks like Big Al is a little fitter than Mikey. We pick Al to win because Michael Moore would likely blow up in the ring during the first minute from over-exertion. Al wins and Michael Moore gets a toe tag in this one.

Last but not least, Billy Gibbons versus Dusty Hill in a Yosemite Sam death match. A scrap between the two front-men from ZZ Top would be a tough call for king of the ring. The big question would be whether beard-pulling is allowed in UFC.

This one would be too tough to call, so we have to end this one in a draw.

Besides, these two cats are still too cool for UFC.