A CAR GUY LOOKS AT GUNS FROM A CAR GUY POINT OF VIEW

I'm a car guy. My interests lean heavily toward horsepower over firepower. But we live in a world with enthusiasts in both camps.

So I decided to interpret the gun world from a car guy's perspective...

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CHANGING A FLAT TIRE: ONE MORE MILE ON THE ROAD TO MANHOOD

I was at a family reunion earlier this summer. They are always a lot of fun because the general mood is so much better than family funerals.

The common DNA bond makes for a good mixer at a reunion and this one was no exception. I enjoy time spent with my kinfolk better than ever as I get older.

You always learn something new at a gathering of the clan.But this year I learned a disturbing secret when one of my cousins arrived late for the reunion.

He explained that he had a flat tire on the way down to our reunion.

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HOW TO FIGURE OUT IF YOU ARE AT A CHICK FLICK: THE DANGER SIGNS

You never know, sometimes movie producers get one past the goalie and suddenly you are face to theater screen with a chick flick.

You didn't deserve it, but now you have just paid serious dough to watch a movie with no sex, violence or nudity. The mistake is a very painful reminder that you have to be more vigilant next time.

The first thing that you have to do is scope out the gender ratio at the theater. A disproportionate number of females in the lobby is a red flag.

A collection of sad-looking guys with these women is another apocalyptic sign.

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EARTH BITES:PUT A GUN TO MY HEAD IF YOU WANT ME TO WATCH TALENT/REALITY TV

The new land of TV opportunity has names like "American Idol"and "Faded Celebrities Like To Dance", or something to that effect. They are cheap to produce and they are incredibly popular with their niche television audience.

I am not now, nor will I ever be, a part of that niche.

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