CHICAGO-NO LONGER THE SECOND CITY WHEN IT COMES TO HOCKEY SUPREMACY

Congratulations Chicago, you finally got Stanley to visit after 49 long years. The Chicago Black Hawks have won the Stanley Cup for the first time since 1961, so it's been a long time since the Second City bumped up to first class in hockey.

A lot of things were different in 1961. John Kennedy was still learning the Presidential game in the heat of a Cold War invasion of Cuba that failed miserably in the Bay of Pigs.

Del Shannon was at number one on the pop charts with 'Runaway'. Bobby Hull still had his own hair, and his Chicago Black Hawks had the Stanley Cup.

It was a long time ago.

Read more: CHICAGO-NO LONGER THE SECOND CITY WHEN IT COMES TO HOCKEY SUPREMACY

CARS ARE PEOPLE TOO: WHY WE ATTACH HUMAN TRAITS TO OUR CARS

The most famous car with a human personality was probably Herbie the Love Bug. Herbie was an old school Volkswagen Beetle that had all of the noble traits that make humans a great species.

Not bad for an underpowered car with a history of rollovers.

Christine was the most famous evil car ever made for the movies. This particular 1958 Plymouth was a stone cold killer b***h. To know her was to be killed by her, even if you did everything right for this murderous finned psycho-car.

Somewhere far short of Hollywood fantasy is the truth about our relationships with our vehicles. We like to humanize our rides and, at some very simple level, the labels apply to our four-wheeled friends.

A car relationship is based upon dependability and trust.

Read more: CARS ARE PEOPLE TOO: WHY WE ATTACH HUMAN TRAITS TO OUR CARS

SIX MORE THINGS THAT WAITRESSES REALLY HATE ABOUT THEIR JOBS

We put together a list a while ago that had six things that waitresses really hate about their job. For those of you that missed it, look under our editorial section for part one.

But sometimes the money can be great, and that will balance out six more things that waitress really hate about their job.

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TODAY'S QUESTION: WHY DOES BILL MAHER P***S ME OFF SO MUCH?

The funny thing about Bill Maher is that he is a pretty funny guy. It's just that his giant ego and overwhelming sense of self- importance gets in the way. Not to mention his smarmy condescension. That is the tediously unfunny side of this clown.

The guy is roughly my age so I can call his BS at will, and he shovels a fair amount of it at his gullible followers. His 'Real Time' program is his personal soap box and he uses it to educate the ignorant and unwashed, by Maher standards anyway.

Bill Maher is one of those guys who sparked up a lot of joints during his high school years and probably was not taken too seriously. Maybe that was the defining moment for a future career as a comedian.

Maybe his equally stoned friends bumped up his confidence by laughing at everything he said, regardless of the possibility that maybe Bill had the best pot. Good pot that gave them the munchies and long bouts of uncontrollable giggling.

These days Bill has a nervous laugh after every one of his punch-lines. The nervous giggle may be a by-product of decades of pot use, or it may be a lack of confidence in his material.

Bill likes to recycle his material- and not for green reasons.

Read more: TODAY'S QUESTION: WHY DOES BILL MAHER P***S ME OFF SO MUCH?